Sometimes, embracing change can be quite a challenge. Especially because change always seems to hit you in bundles. Change can also mean stress in some cases, loads of it, and I must admit I've had my fair share recently. But change can also be beneficial if you remain open enough to see the goood through the fog of dread.
It was yesterday that I was handed the latest installment of my 2008-2009 "you either ajust or abdicate" life plan. It was also my first lesson in about a month. And in the meantime, some disagreements between the barn owner and the coaches led to a conflict, which as a result led to Meeka not being on the school horses roster as of January 1. They usually loaned her from the BO... not anymore.
I have been riding her for a year now, we were starting to be a team, and I would not say it breaks my heart but it certainly makes me sad not to be able to ride her anymore. Then coach introduced me to Angie.
She's a beautiful chestnut mare with a frizzy mane of the likes I had never seen. Towering over me with her 16 something hands (I know, I'm not very tall) she has a very soft expression, almost benevolent I would say, which earned my trust and affection at once. I saddled her up and off we were to the arena, which felt more like the freezer compartment of our current refrigerator/barn. Both Angie and I were blowing clowds of mist as I was hopping in the saddle and I had a sympathetic thought for Cynthia who has to teach in these deep-freeze conditions.
The lesson in itself went pretty well. But I will definitely need to make some ajustments to the way I currently ride. In fact, I will probably need to take a huge step up. Fist of all, Angie is much more sensitive in the mouth. That means no pulling anymore, not even the faintest jerk or there will be consequences. Oh! Really? Meeka was half Clydesdale, so if you didn't pull and/or jerk, she simply didn't seem to feel anything. She was quite forgiving, in fact, so it was reassuring for the beginner that I was, but now, it seemed I have moved from a rugged all wheel drive to a more nervous and energetic sports car. Yikes!!!
Also, I will most probably need to RE-overcome my fear of canter. Why? Well, when I said energetic, I meant it. She barely needs leg support. Remember the Kyra Kyrklund kick-sled principle? Well just one push and this sweetie will slide for a good long while! But in return, when she's all revved-up, she will have much more initiative than Meeka did. "Wanna play? Wanna run?" Errr. Sure... But can we slow down a bit? I had a little panic moment on the canter when I realized we were heading for the barn entrance full throttle and my infamous heels were not down. **sigh** With Meeka, sufficed stopping the leg aids and she was more than happy to slow down to whatever, But with Angie... two words: kick sled!!!
I did succeed in making her stop, but for the first time ever, I heard myself signifying my discontent with a well rounded "Wooooooooaaahhh!" that would have sounded great in one of John Wayne's western flicks but not so much coming from a dressage rider, rookie or not. Right?
Anyway, this change will be good. I will miss Meeka and her temper, I will miss her strong, reassuring presence and her good looks, I will miss rubbing her nose until she falls asleep on the chains, I will miss her nice feathered hooves, but I WILL welcome Angie for all that SHE has to teach me now.
So here, as everywhere else in my life right now, I agree that I need to step out of my comfort zone. And you can count on me, with Cynthia's help, I will find out how to make the best of it.
